Sunday, June 03, 2007

Red Pill, Anyone?

Fans of The Matrix will know what I am talking about. I want to take one more post to lay out some of what has been going through my mind lately and then I will attempt to get back to the purpose of this blog. Although since the title is Life, the Universe and Unschooling, nothing would technically be off topic, right? What is happening to me right now IS my life and in small but increasing ways becoming my children's life as well, so it does fit in this blog. Besides, it's my blog. It is what I say it is.

Anywhoo, I feel like I have inadvertently swallowed that red pill from The Matrix and now I see the truth. What to do with that truth, I don't know. Yet. I'm sure I will figure it out soon enough.

What is the truth that I am speaking of, you ask? The fact that we are destroying our planet and in turn ourselves. The way that most of us don't seem to notice or care. The fact that our way of life on this planet is unsustainable. Meaning it cannot be sustained. The definition of sustain is to keep in existence; maintain; prolong. Our way of life is not going to keep us in existence for very much longer.

Ok, so now what? I have a few options:

1. I can curl up in a ball and cry out in fury and despair for all that is lost.

Check.
That was not fun.

2. I can zoom out my viewpoint, way out, and see that if we continue doing business as usual and kill ourselves and the planet we call home it does not really matter in the grand scheme of things. I can see that we are simply following the natural order of things and Nature will re-balance Herself, with or without us. And it is all good because I am not really my body after all, or not only my body. I will go on in my true form which is Spirit and Spirit is forever.

Oooo-kaay. Might as well just check out now, if it all doesn't matter anyway, right?
No, I came here for a reason. Or at least I prefer to think that I have.

3. I can zoom in a bit more and hold the whole of the dying world in my heart and work tirelessly to make changes to save myself and everyone else on the planet. All of us. People, plants, bugs, pandas, whales, and everything. I can, until my dying breath, speak out against what we are doing, trying to change the minds and hearts of every last one of us, so that we have a chance to save ourselves. No matter how hopeless that really is. I will alienate everyone I know in this noble, yet vain, attempt to save the world, leaving me bitter and alone in my righteousness. But, hey, at least I tried.

Does that exhaust you as much as it does me, just thinking about it?

4. I can put the blinders back on - even if I have to use three rolls of duct tape and a bottle of superglue to keep them in place - and party it up until the end, trying to drown out the voice of reason with more and more of what our culture has to offer. Endless buying, fear numbing entertainment, exciting world travel, fascinating scientific breakthroughs, more, more, more, until I can't any more and then....(see #1).

Not if want to live with myself. Those blinders are too flimsy to last very long and when they do finally fall off, the guilt would kill me before I could get the gun to my temple.

5. I can buy into the idea that technology and human innovation will save us. My salvation is assured with solar panels and windmills, composting toilets and organic gardens, deeper community and bartering, bicycles and local markets, birth control and green building.

Even though I know this to be pointless, I will most likely do all of the above. It's better than #4, even if it requires lots of consumption and holds little chance of success.

6. I can zoom in my view reeeaaallly tight and focus on me and mine and our daily life moment by moment, choosing to act from my new frame of reference, hopefully more wisely. I can stay in the Joy that is Life and learn to make lots of lemonade with all the lemons that will be thrown our way as the sh*t hits the fan. And it will.

Lemonade, anyone? I like this one, even if in the end it turns out to be the wrong choice. I've got to live with what I have now and find a way to make it good, or I might as well give up. I can't always do the right thing -if that can even be determined - but I can make the best of everything. I can live in Joy and Peace and Love. I can take the spiritual high road and make every moment worth living, until the last.

Honestly, I imagine I will end up doing a little bit of all of the above. But to maintain my sanity, #6 is going to be my resting place. # 3 will pop up once in a while, so bear with me. # 5 will be what I do when I need to take action. # 4 will be what I find myself doing when I have stopped thinking for a while, or can't handle the Truth. I will punish myself with #1 and # 2 will bring me back out of despair.

So there you have it. Miranda's plan to save the world, or at least what to do as the end approaches! Hope that helps someone. It helped me, anyway....

3 comments:

heymom said...

I'm feeling some of this, too. You are not alone. I like to stay in #5 and #6, but visit the others, too. Although, I don't think #3 is so bad. It's tiring to try to impact change on a big scale, and I am not doing so....yet. But, there were great people who walked this earth before us,whos convictions were so powerful, and such a driving force that, though they were ONE....they were MIGHTY. I think of MLK JR., and Ghandi, and even Mother Teresa...women who marched for the rights of women, and people who stood up against slavery. I think that the key to their success was 1)timing...when the time was right, people began to listen....and 2)they didn't give up.
Hang in there...I think the time is right. The issues we face have been known for a while...we are finally opening our eyes. Let's just not give up.
love ya, friend.

Stephanie said...

Heh heh. I was going to say, "a little of column a, a little of column b..." I'm glad you've laid it all out like that and said you'll hit all numbers, 1-6. One person and one life doesn't mean that you have to embrace just one choice, one way to face what's coming. I sometimes forget that and fall into number one just because I can't figure out which path I'm supposed to take. Oh boy! I can do all those things! I can even embrace my despair! Just realizing that makes me feel better and I'm not sure I did until I read this post.

Ren said...

I think your responsibility is to your own family. The world will do as the world does and the only way to change anything is by taking responsibility for our own choices and protecting our families.

Yep, I think the shit's gonna hit the fan too....when? I don't know. It's been broiling and brewing along at an amazing rate.

I take steps in my life towards sustainability....growing our own food, taking care of our little plot of land.

Is it enough and fast enough? Maybe not. But I do what I can do and keep my cynical side to myself for the most part.:)

My children take great joy in growing our food...so we focus on the joy.

You might really enjoy CG's blog:
http://contrarygoddess.blogspot.com/